5am Meditation Day 43- Practicing "minis"

I had a couple of minutes between responsibilities today, so I decided to do a "mini" while waiting for my next appointment. I reflected on how calm and peaceful I was, and how I should definitely keep this in mind the next time I get sad or scared or angry or overwhelmed. I imagined myself taking a minute to sit on my meditation cushion instead of crying myself into a tension headache.

And then I thought about this past week, and reality hit me. Who am I kidding!?! Do I really think I will be able to have the self awareness and mindfulness to stop myself before crying to sit down and center myself? I am currently in the last week of my last course towards a new degree, and I still cry about homework deadlines! I got so stressed out earlier this week, that one day I came home and took a 3-hour nap because I just couldn't handle the pressure anymore and was completely exhausted with a headache from the day before. Every course along this past 4-year journey has been one tension headache after the other, and yet I always end up doing very well on my assignments and in the courses. When will I learn!?! I spend all my time and energy worrying and stressing for nothing.

I recently shared an activity with my students about the online me/offline me where we looked at the different roles we play and the personalities traits that each role brings out in us. Below is the "me" I shared with my students:

Offline

mother- nurturing, playful, fun, silly, loving, caring, protective

teacher- serious, academic, professional

student- stressed, overwhelmed, anxious, cry a lot, worried negative, tired, cranky

(yogini, runner, coach, athlete, baker/chef, sister, friend, daughter, etc.)

Online

twitter- serious, academic, professional, academic technology

blogger- calm, relaxed, wise, yoga and meditation

student- polished, professional, great student, academic, serious

(facebook, reading news, watching Youtube, playing games, shopping, paying bills, etc.)

I explained to my students that when I am at home being a student, I am stressed and anxious and feel overwhelmed, as I always have as a student since I was in 6th grade. I worry about getting assignments done and not having enough time. I am a perfectionist, and it always takes its toll on me. But the person I present online as a student is very different, because what gets posted online is my final product, my professional, academic, serious, hard-working self. I am the same person in both cases, but very different sides of me come out through the process and the final product.

No matter how good my final work is, I never trust myself the next time around that it will get done, and that it will be good. The next time I get overwhelmed about an assignment or a deadline, I am hoping that by practicing my "minis" in the meantime, it will get me to the point where I can walk away from the stressors, breathe, and just witness the negative emotions until I am centered. And then I can do whatever needs to get done without any more tension headaches. Maybe it's just wishful thinking, or maybe just "putting it down on paper" takes me one step closer to my goal. Only time (and headaches) will tell...

Relaxation Response to Reduce Stress

Eliciting the Relaxation Response

Minis

Relaxation Response Videos from MGH's Benson-Henry Institute for Mind Body Medicine

5am Meditation Day 42- Relaxation Response

Yesterday we had a representative from the Massachusetts General Hospital's Benson-Henry Institute for Mind Body Medicine give a presentation to our entire faculty and staff on stress and relaxation techniques. Below are some of my take-aways:

Most people consider stress to be tension, anxiety, feeling overwhelmed, being scared, etc. Stress is actually your body's response to perceived danger or threat when you feel that you do not have the resources to cope. Most people encounter stress about 50 times per day, but how we handle the stress varies from person to person. A stressor can be your alarm going off, getting kids ready for school and getting out the door in time, traffic, finding a parking spot, running late for a meeting, etc. The most key word in the definition of stress is perceived. We often feel that we cannot get something done because we don't have the ability or the time. We perceive that things will not get done, and we end up feeling overwhelmed or anxious. Everyone encounters these moments in their daily lives. How do you prevent the stress from ruining your day and getting worse and worse with every encounter? The relaxation response.

You cannot control the traffic or a child who needs a spill cleaned up before heading out the door in the morning. But you can control how you respond. In the moment, it is important to acknowledge the negative thoughts by witnessing them, but then letting them go. Don't let them get to you and ruin your mood or your day. Simply observe the thoughts and move on. There are certain factors that are within your control. In any stressful situation, there's either a solution- so do it, or there's no solution, and there's no use in stressing over it. You can view the exact same situation through many lenses, so it is all about our perspective, our perceived inability to handle the situation.

The Mind Body Institute realized that people's health was negatively affected by stress. We can respond to the stress and health issues after the fact, or we can proactively deal with them through healthy lifestyles. This includes eating well, exercising, getting sufficient sleep, and getting relaxation through yoga, meditation, massage, listening to music, etc. The Relaxation Response also involves deep breathing, meditation, guided meditation, mindfulness, and visualization. Yesterday we learned about "minis," taking 2-10 minutes to sit quietly and just observe your thoughts. The presenter discussed how this technique could be done in the morning, during a break, in the car, or even brought into the classroom as a tool to use with our students to help them get centered and focused before class begins. We had also watched the film "The Race to Nowhere" earlier in the day, so a lot of our conversation was centered around students stress.

Next time you are in a stressful situation, try to just stop, breathe, witness the situation, and be aware your reacting thoughts and feelings to it. Then respond. See if there's a difference when you take the time to breathe and be aware before reacting.

Benson-Henry Institute for Mind Body Medicine: The Education Initiative

The Race to Nowhere